To be or not to be… that’s the million dollar question… have been quite apprehensive about this particular thing for what seems like ages now… have been equally apprehensive about confessing this particular thing in public… Still, it doesn’t look like i have gathered enough guts to admit this in front of the people who should definitely know this… after months of reading self-help books and solving stupid seating arrangements, clocks, calendar and what not questions , it seems all that was in vain… this is not something i can be good at or maybe i will be good at… to be true i have become too tired of having a set path for me… i want some uncertainty in life (for some weird reason 😐 :|)…
And for all those who are wondering what the hell i am talking about here is the story.. Growing up there was this day when an Aeroplane flying up high in the sky sparked my curiosity and that very moment i decided i wanted to be an Engineer… i wanted to be amongst those who built those little marvels… but life doesn’t come easy, i couldn’t qualify for the institute which provide that course so i had to settle to work with electric current and analog and digital meters… yes, i am currently in final year and yes i am pursuing engineering but why does it still feel as if i haven’t done what i ought to… why does it feel as if i am not on the track i have to finally be on… it’s a bit too much pressure i guess..
Ok, so there is this impending question as to what to do after graduation.. job.. seriously, who would hire an average girl from an average institute for a substantial amount that would guarantee atleast some satisfaction in life… All i managed was to land with a pay package of 3.16 L annually.. and it is almost next to impossible to survive in a city with that kind of amount… so the question returns,,… what do i want to do NOW… ???….
It somehow seems that everything i wanted and lusted for (figuratively) has seemed to lost all its meaning.. So the million dollar question is TO BE OR NOT TO BE … something i can’t truly identify with now but something i have always wanted to be… 😐 😐 😐
DISCLAIMER: Ek satya ghatna pe adharit… sabhi patra asli hain.. kripya isse kahani na samjhen.. 😀 😀